The Sketch: Truth in politics? Trust the Speaker

How are we to explain the Speaker's extraordinary behaviour? Politicians never quite mean what they say and certainly don't say what they'll do. Michael Martin is doing precisely what he has promised. Only one answer is possible: he has risen out of the swamp of political life. He has discarded his low acquaintance. He has ascended by Jacob's Ladder into that Elysium where only Speakers can breathe the air. He has become the remote and rather awful Old Testament character Speakers are supposed to be; in parliamentary terms he is that he is, he is the word. I hope he won't ask me to his Christmas party; if I look at him I'll burst into flames.

Three examples from yesterday. He granted what used to be called a Private Notice Question to the Conservatives. This summons a minister to the House to give an account of him or herself. Yesterday, Mr Thing applied to have the Prime Minister present himself and the request was approved. As Tony Blair had spent a good deal of the morning saying the same things on television it was what people call a victory for Parliament.

Second: Mr Martin had said he wanted to move question time along. Fantastic windbaggery meant we were rarely getting beyond question 10. Yesterday we got to number 25. It's true the batting order collapses if you bowl along faster than normal – MPs who assume they are too far down the list don't turn up and their question is scratched. None the less. Question 25.

And finally, he chose not to select the Conservative amendment for the Iraq debate. Theirs was an anodyne, shoulder-to-shoulder amendment supporting the Government. No, he chose the Liberal Democrat amendment, which ensured a vote would be taken on whether parliament would, prior to a shooting war, be able to vote to authorise it.

Betty Boothroyd encouraged the theatrical aspects of the House, permitting and perhaps encouraging the roaring, operatic duets of PMQs. Michael Martin is cutting back on the show-time and, by the perpetual paradox of political life, producing something more interesting.

Which is more than can be said for Mr Thing. We all agree he was better than expected, yesterday. But this is simply not good enough. For once, the Government is all over the place. Its strategic utterances have the calm coherence of a burning zoo. John Prescott goes live with a public grand mal. The Prime Minister himself is brutally reduced in stature. And people are being burnt to death because of government incompetence. And yet Mr Thing can neither batter the PM; nor can he rally his troops to do it for him.

He hasn't the weight, he hasn't the wallop. If the strike tells us anything it is that the Leader of the Opposition has to go.

simoncarr75@hotmail.com