James Comey book – live reading: Fired FBI director finally reveals all about the 'pee tape', Trump's hands and more

That remark about laughing is characteristic of this bit: he keeps making interesting observations about the president, and then making an effort to make them into nuggets of business advice. And he continues, here, when talking about the fact that, towards the end of the dinner, Trump once again asked Comey for his loyalty.

"Ethical leaders never ask for loyalty," he reflects. "Those leading through fear – like a Cosa Nostra boss – require personal loyalty. Ethical leaders care deeply about those they lead, and offer them honesty and decency, commitment and their own sacrifice [...] It would never occur to an ethical leader to ask for loyalty."

[Which – I mean – sure? But this is Donald Trump. Is anyone turning to him as an example of a good business leader, in this sort of sense? I don't even think his supporters would think this, really. But Comey seems committed to the idea that he needs this book to give useful advice to leaders in business and elsewhere, and that simply describing his bizarre time with Trump isn't enough.]

Anyway, the dinner's over now. They had two scoops of ice cream for dessert. I'd expect more if I was going to the White House.

Soon after that fateful dinner, Comey was summoned to the White House to meet with Reince Priebus, who was then Trump's chief of staff. He was asked there to explain the relationship between the FBI and the White House, he says.

But after that was over, Priebus sprung on him a suggestion: should they go and meet the president? Priebus checks that he's in and they head on over to the Oval Office. Comey gives us another description of Trump as president:

Though this was not the first time I'd seen the new president, it was the first I had seen him in his new office. He didn't look comfortable. He was sitting, suit jacket on, close against the famous Resolute desk, both forearms on the desk. As a result, he was separated from everyone who spoke to him by a large block of wood.

(Has Comey not heard of a desk before? That's sort of how they work.)

Comey also notes that Trump had changed the curtains so they are now "bright gold".

Anyway they get down to what they had apparently been brought together to talk about: a Bill O'Reilly interview with Trump. In it, the president had refused to outright criticise Putin, which many took as a weakness and a potential sign that the two were closer than they let on.

Trump jabbered on about this, describing how great his answer was and how hard the question was. Comey describes how people around Trump are used to this, and seem to let it happen because it's easier than getting in the way. He uses this chatter to build a "cocoon of alternative reality" – because people don't disagree with him, those things must be true, and so he is able to convince himself. But then Trump asks what Comey thinks – and Comey gets in the way.

Comey disagrees with Trump's suggestion that, like Putin's Russia, the US has killers of its own. "The first part of your answer was fine, Mr President," Comey quotes himself saying, "but not the second part. We aren't the kind of killers that Putin is."

Comey says this signalled a discrete and profound change between the two of them. A look flashed across Trump's face and the meeting was over. He left, and told his team the personal relationship with Trump was probably over.

Another meeting: this time around, Comey is called into talk about Mike Flynn, who had just quit as national security adviser after it became clear that he had discussed sensitive information with the Russian ambassador and then lied about doing so.

Trump appeared to suggest that the FBI should give Flynn some space. He also complained about the continual leaks of classified information.

Comey didn't assent to either, he says. He agreed that Flynn "is a good guy" but wouldn't agree to "let this go".

This – combined with the other meetings – was so awkward that the next time Comey met with then-attorney general Jeff Sessions he asked him to keep the two from meeting one-on-one again. But he suggests that he wasn't confident that would happen, even at the time.

Comey then describes Trump calling him, repeatedly, to describe the Russia investigation as a "cloud" that he wanted rid of. The president wanted it to be made clear that he personally wasn't under investigation.

Comey describes the last time they spoke. Trump wanted assurances that he needed rid of the cloud; Comey said he could only commit to having spoken to the Department of Justice, and that he should do the same. The call ended.

With it began the end of their relationship, too.

[We're now into the final act stuff – Comey's firing – and we've got about 10 pages left. Hang in there.]

Now comes the utterly bizarre story of Comey's removal as director. Stick with this one.

It began on 9 May, when Comey was heading to LA to speak with talented young lawyers, engineers and businesspeople of colour to try and convince them to come and join the FBI. He says he liked these events, because they helped dispel the idea among young black and Latinx people that the FBI was "the man", and that they should take a pay cut and come and work in the intelligence community.

He's doing this, speaking to staff in the LA bureau, when he saw something –

"On the TV screens along the back wall I could see COMEY RESIGNS in large letters. The screens were behind my audience, but they noticed my distraction and started turning in their seats. I laughed and said, 'That's pretty funny. Somebody put a lot of work into that one.' I continued my thought. 'There are no support employees in the FBI. I expect...'"

Then the message on the screen changed to "COMEY FIRED". The FBI director finished his message – telling the assembled crowd that it wouldn't change whether or not he was still their boss – and went to try and find out what happened.

Comey describes how he travels with a special team to ensure that he can always be reached. "But nobody called."

The aftermath sounds like utter bedlam.

"All I knew was what was being reported in the media. After much scrambling, we learned that a White House employee was down on Pennsylvania Avenue in Washington, trying to deliver a letter to me from the president."

John Kelly, who was then secretary of Homeland Security, rang to say he was upset and would quit in protest. Comey says he told him not to – "the country needed principled people around this president".

Eventually Comey got hold of the letter through his assistant, who had scanned it and emailed it over. It told him he was fired, effective immediately.

Comey didn't even know how to get home. The new FBI boss, Andrew McCabe, who until moments ago had been his deputy, decided that the FBI still had a responsibility to look after him and so took him home to Washington. (Even this apparently infuriated Trump: Comey says the morning after, when Trump had seen news footage of him using the plane, the president called the new FBI director and demanded an investigation into how he'd been allowed to.)

Comey now reveals the thinking behind one of his leaks: that he would tell the media that Trump had asked him to drop the investigation into Flynn. The decision to do so came in the weak of a bizarre tweet from Trump that many construed as a threat: "James Comey better hope there are no 'tapes' of our conversations before he starts leaking to the press".

So he leaked the contents of the memo he wrote after that conversation. Comey is notably roundabout in how he describes this – but credits the decision to do so with potentially leading to the decision to launch a special counsel in the Russia investigation.

Comey says he's grateful for that. "I do know that, as of this writing, Special Counsel Mueller and his team are hard at work and the American people can have confidence that, unless their investigation is blocked in some fashion, they will get to the truth, whatever that is."

The book ends (apart from the epilogue, which we'll get to) with Comey describing his testimony before the Senate Select Committee on Intelligence. This is important at a meta level: this book will no doubt be getting pored through by White House officials to try and find some difference in his testimony that day and what he has written. But Comey seems to see that day as his ultimate statement: he reproduces what he told the senators in his prepared remarks.

In the epilogue, Comey finally gives his personal view on much of what has gone on, and lays out his arguments about why the current situation is so terrible. Given that it is the most emotional and principled bit of the book, it's probably not best to summarise but to quote some of its strongest parts:

"I am writing in a time of great anxiety in my country. I understand the anxiety, but also believe America is going to be fine. I choose to see opportunity as well as danger."

"Donald Trump's presidency threatens much of what is good in this nation."

"Whatever your politics, it is wrong to dismiss the damage to the norms and traditions that have guided the presidency and our public life for decades or, in many cases, since the republic was founded. It is also wrong to stand idly by, or worse, to stay silent when you know better, while a president brazenly seeks to undermine public confidence in law enforcement institutions that were established to keep our leaders in check."

And he ends on an incredibly optimistic note:

"The next president, no matter the party will sure emphasise values – truth, integrity, respect, and tolerance – in ways an American leader hasn't needed to for more than forty years. The fire will make something good grow.

"I wrote this book because I hope it will be useful to people living among the flames who are thinking about what comes next. I also hope it will be useful to readers long after the flames are doused, by inspiring them to choose a higher loyalty, to find truth among lies, and to pursue ethical leadership."